Born Again
by EleanoRambaldi
Summary: Post apocalyptic. Quinn and Rachel are far apart, trying to survive in a wrecked world where all the rules are changed. No zombie or vampires, just humanity at his worst. Possible Faberry later on.
1. Why am I not dead?

**Post apocalyptic. Quinn and Rachel are far apart, trying to survive in a wrecked world where all the rules are changed. No zombie or vampires, just humanity at his worst. Faberry later on.**

**General warnings: it's an angst/hurt and comfort fic so I think you know what you're getting yourself into but just to be safe I'll warn you about possible deaths (not main characters...), violence references and drug use. A particular warning about Rachel: she will show up but later on, the main character here is Quinn and since at the beginning of the story they are far apart... well, you might have to wait a little to see them together, that's it****, but she will show up, don't worry. Final warning about me: I'****ve been writing fanfiction for a very long time but this is my first English attempt. Feel free to point me out when I make a mistake. Synonymous suggestion are good too ;)**

**Also, reviews are appreciated.**

* * *

**BORN AGAIN**

* * *

It all started with earthquakes.

Nothing to worry about at first, it was San Francisco after all, and news from all over the world didn't seem to be important back then, they were at the bottom of the news, just as reminder that earthquakes where really something normal, that happened everywhere: Japan, Italy, south Africa…

Then it hit again, a second time: New York. And a third, a fourth, and countless more.

* * *

The sun was hitting hard on her. She was thirsty, tired, and all she could think about was finding some place dark and cold to rest. The road in front of her seemed endless and the heat made it tremble in the air, making her see things that weren't really there.

_I need a hat!_

She had left the last town four days before. Like many other she visited before there wasn't much left. Most of the buildings were collapsed, some burned, some were still up but didn't look secure enough for her to go in. There were a bunch of houses left, just outside town, and she hoped she could find there something useful or at least eatable, but when she was closer she saw that there were already inhabited so she run away before they could spot her.

She had learned the hard way that it wasn't safe, in these days, trusting the others.

_I should sit. For a moment._

_No way Quinn, keep going!_

She had no idea where the hell she was in the continent. There were even continents anymore? Maybe not. Maybe the Earth had another shape right now. Maybe she was in Europe or Japan or Canada or… whatever. She smiled. She always wanted to go to Canada, God knows why.

_I like it. Canada. I like it here._

Her lips were cracked and they hurt a little bit, like the rest of her body: her legs, her back, her neck. She would have killed for a bed right now, and the chances were someone might really die before she had the chance to rest in a proper place.

_Note to yourself Quinn Fabray: always have extra spare water in your backpack! Or wine. Or beer. Beer works too._

In the last months she learned a lot of things in order to survive but still she knew she kept on making mistakes over and over again, trusting the wrong people, leaving something vital behind, or just taking the wrong road. Surviving wasn't a joke or a reality show, out there it was real and it didn't matter how much she tried her best, she had realized long ago that she wasn't fit for that world. She should have died like the others. Their death was horrible, and brutal, and unexpected, and scary, yes, but still, far better than the life she was facing right now.

_Oh God, I want a pizza so bad!_

The thought came into her mind all of a sudden, and it surprised her like it was someone else's. She found herself smiling. Yeah, she could have killed for pizza, and a coke, and ice cream, and the above mentioned bed, of course, and the sight of another living human being.

She tripped and fell down on her knees.

_Shit!_

She didn't have the strength to say it out loud; just thinking it drained her of her last energies. She just stood there, in the middle of a road, slowly rocking, like a leaf in the wind, unable to even think to stand up.

_I must look like an addict. Heroin. Rocking in the wind. Shit._

Her thoughts became blurry and when she realized she was having problems making sense even in her own mind, she knew the end was approaching.

_Fine. I should die with a thoughtful thought. Something spectacular. Important. Revealing. Nobody loves… no… everybody loves… no… I once loved… I wish… shit!_

Then all went black!

* * *

_Why am I not dead?_

Even before she could open her eyes she knew something was wrong. It was the feeling of something soft under her cheek, and on her shoulder. She opened her eyes and for a second, while her vision focused, all she could see was blue.

_I'm underwater?_

She rolled on to her side and something pointy hit her.

- Shit!

She got up to a sitting position and realized she was in a blue tent. Next to her there were two backpacks, a pair of gym shoes and another sleeping bag already rolled up.

- Hello sleepy head.

The voice startled her and Quinn drew back immediately. The woman entered and kneeled down in front of her.

- Sorry, I didn't' mean to startle you, I'm… My name is Anya.

The woman looked at her waiting for Quinn to introduce herself but, since Quinn didn't look like talking at all, she shook her head and went on.

- We found you on the street this morning. We, being me, Anya, and my friend, Mal, who's out there checking the perimeter, so to speak. Don't worry about him: he's big, black and silent most of the time, which I guess it 's good since I'm talking pretty much always so, I'd say we're quite a match!

Quinn was trying to catch up but there were too much info and she was still too confused. She could only elaborate simple thing so she tried to start with basic stuff. The woman was wearing a long shirt and a pair of jeans, her hair was up in a loose ponytail and she looked really skinny and really pale. She didn't look like a threat although she clearly talked too much and too fast. She seemed hyperactive, like needs-medical-assistance-to-control-herself hyperactive, but not dangerous

- Thirsty? - The girl took a bottle and offered it to her.

Quinn knew better than to just accept something from a stranger. She did it once, in the past, and it turned out to be a very bad idea. Anya seemed to understand this and placed the bottle near her sleeping bag.

- Whenever you're ready. I'll leave it here. Just… small sips, and try to make it last. We don't have much anymore and we need to find some new supply.

Quinn nodded.

- Care to tell me your name or do I have to keep calling you sleepy head?

- Quinn. Quinn Fabray.

- Nice to meet you Quinn. – Anya smiled.

Somehow Quinn found herself mirroring that gesture. During the last months she had learned to doubt stranger's good intentions, but no matter how hard she tried in that moment, she couldn't remind herself that Anya was a potential deadly enemy. But this probably was just her condition talking. Dehydration, lack of sleep, unnerving and stupid optimism or something like that.

_Back on track Fabray. Focus._

- You probably need some time, right? – She didn't wait for an answer – Right, I'm sorry, it's not like I want to invade your personal space I just, you know, it's been a while since we actually met someone else so… Ok, let's try this one: I'm going to go out now, and whenever you're ready you can join us, me and Mal. We're going to have something to eat ok?

She smiled, again (_gosh, why the hell is she smiling so much?) _then she left leaving Quinn alone in the tent.

Quinn waited a few seconds to be sure Anya was really gone before taking the bottle and smelling the water. Not that she could really detect anything in it with just her nose but she did it anyway, out of conscience, so she could tell herself she was being cautious. She took a first small sip. Water tasted like eggs but it wasn't so strange: water wasn't what it used to be anymore and she had drunk much worse even before the apocalypse.

She looked up and she realized that there was a bright light behind the plastic.

_Day. Maybe late in the morning. _

Her backpack was lying down next to her sleeping bag. She reached for it to check if everything was still inside: K-way, knife, empty bottle, just a spare t-shirt, sunglasses, what was left of her phone, an old watch, all accounted for. It wasn't much of a survival bag but that's all she had.

She remembered her old house, an apartment on the third floor, the wall she turned into a gigantic painting thanks to her friend Lia, and all the cd, clothes, books, posters, shoes, dishes and glasses, pictures, old toys, stereo and computer, plants, homemade lamps… It took her a couple of years but she finally turned an anonymous house into her home. It was her practical sense hanging from the ceiling with the homemade lamp, and it was her soul stitched with all those photos with her friends.

And now it was all gone: her home, her things, and her old self.

She sighed and got up bracing herself for everything that would wait her outside, were it hungry dinosaurs or just the two regular guys Anya described.


	2. The Park

**Although I'm publishing just chapter 2 I'm currently writing chapter 11 (I would love to publish with some regularity so I'm giving myself a fair start in case life gets in the way) and I can tell you this story is gonna be quite long, consider yourself warned.**

**I hope you enjoy and see you soon with next chapter ;)**

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**CHAPTER 2: THE PARK**

There was definitely a lot of green. Trees and grass, and the shirt the man _(what was his name again? Mel? Mal? Something like that)_ was wearing. That place didn't look like the last she remembered before fainting out

- Where are we?

- Hello there. Let me introduce you. Quinn, this is Mal, Mal, this is Quinn.

The man nodded toward her. He was sitting on the grass, eating an apple, and he looked like the average regular guy.

- Come on Quinn, sit here.

She followed Anya's hint and sat on the grass near them.

- How are you feeling?

- I'm ok, I guess.

It was true. The throbbing in her head she had when she woke up was mostly gone, but there was still a dull ache behind her eyes. She felt tired but not wrecked.

- Good. Ok is a nice feeling these days.

The sun was higher than Quinn expected but it wasn't as hot as she remembered. It felt almost nice, one of those days where you could just lay on the grass and let time pass you by.

- Want to eat something? – asked her Anya and, as soon as the word eat was pronounced Quinn's stomach murmured.

Mal smiled and took an apple from his bag for her.

- Here it goes, Mr. Apple Man, no iphone intended. – Joked Anya – I swear I don't know where he gets all those apples. I'm starting to think that bag of his is related to Mary Poppin's one, or at least made of the same fabric but still…

Mal grunted something and got up leaving the two of them alone.

- Don't mind him – Anya informed her – He plays tough but he's a nice guy. And useful too. He always seems to know how to find food.

- But can he talk? – Quinn asked as she watched him go away.

- Fair question. Yes, he can talk, he just doesn't like to. He's that weird. I'm not sure if he was like this before the Apocalypse or because of something that happen after slash during it. Anyways, he's like that now. But he's a nice guy, like… a silent hero, you know? Silent knight… sort of Batman… but I'm blabbering... I do that a lot, feel free to stop me when it happens, and speaking of feeling free, feel free to ask questions too, I guess you have a lot of them now, right? So, shoot!

Quinn had indeed a lot of question but, again, she thought it was better to start from the basic ones.

- Where are we?

- Right. You asked before. The short answer is "Somewhere safe, I hope". The geographical answer is "I don't know". I lost track of our whereabouts when I thought we were near Manchester but I saw mountains that, according to my geography class memories, weren't supposed to be there. So… Canada, Mexico, France… who knows.

- No, what I meant is that this doesn't look like the road where I fainted.

- Oh, that 'where are we'! – Anya snapped her fingers – Of course, my mistake! The road was a few miles back. We couldn't stay there, we were right in the open, so Mal took you on his bike and we move… I guess west, for about an hour. And here we find a city, like, a city with a real park, can you believe it? We arrived here yesterday and took some time to rest. Being on the road is not that simple and…

Anya voice became a noise in the background as Quinn got up and started analyzing the place.

_Shit! I must have lost it in the last days. I was probably going up and down the same road without even realizing it! I've never got away._

- We should leave.

- What? Why?

- Cities aren't safe.

- Yes, well. The whole world is not safe anymore so…

- I'm serious. I've been here and I know what I'm saying. We should go, right now.

After the earthquakes most of the survivors tried to reach the cities to find shelter, army and some sort of government that could help them. But cities weren't what they used to be. If they weren't burnt down they were big cemeteries with corpses slowly decomposing. And people claimed pretty soon the few places where it was still safe to live.

A few months before that wouldn't have been a problem, but during the apocalypse people lost so much – homes, family, friends, and hopes – that most of them developed a strange sense of property. They were ready to defend their newly found possession at all costs.

- We can't leave right now. It must be around midday, it's going to be too hot on the road. Besides we need to look for supplies, we don't have many left.

- Fuck the supplies! We need to go! – burst out Quinn, almost screaming at Anya.

There was a look of horror and fear in her eyes and her bottom lip trembled a little. She realized how she must look like and she turned away from Anya, facing the woods.

Anya got up and approached her quietly. She moved for her shoulder but, at the last moment, she decided not to touch Quinn and lowered her arm.

- Ok, you're upset. I believe you have your reasons and they're probably very good ones. Still, if we go now we might be as well as dead so… Let's keep this simple.

She moved in front of Quinn forcing her to look up. Quinn had regained some composure but there was still a hole in her eyes, something she was trying very hard to push aside in order to focus on Anya's words.

- I take we must avoid something or someone. – Started Anya, hoping that Quinn would fill the blanks. She had to wait a few seconds before Quinn was able to ansewer her.

- Somewhere. – Quinn said – There's a part of this town where we should really not go.

- Ok. – Anya's voice was very calm. She didn't push, but just stood still and waited.

- It's near a bridge, half collapsed, there are still cars on it and you can't really go through unless you have bikes or you're on foot. – Again Anya just nodded taking a small step towards Quinn, closing the distance bit by bit. – There are at least hundred of them that I saw last time, and they move through the entire city. We should hide, they... - Quinn's voice cracked. - They always travel in groups of five.

- Ok, so we will take extra precautions. We will pack our tent and have our backpacks always ready. We'll be silent and extra cautious, I promise.

It was Quinn turn to nod silently She knew she was being childish but she couldn't shake way the image in her head, the five men coming toward her, the hand grabbing her arm, _his_ look, the way he hold her arms behind her back, his voice.

- Quinn? – Anya's voice was soft, just a little bit worried.

And the trip back their camp, decapitated heads impaled on the perimeter, like it was some sort of horror middle age town. And all those woman and children looking tired and annoyed, like what was happening to her was perfectly normal and understandable; the way they talked about her, like she was an object, a thing to be sold, or booked, or used for their own purpose.

- Quinn? – This time Anya touched gently her arm. Quinn shivered but the contact brought her back to the present. – Are you ok?

- Yes, sure I… I'm thinking about a mall. I saw it last time. I didn't get in because something set me off, I got this weird feeling about it, but, I don't know, maybe there's still something useful in it. It's probably safer and faster than trying to look in every abandoned house and, the sooner we find what we need, the sooner we can get away.

- Sounds like a plan. – Agreed Anya.


	3. White Walls

**Very short chapter introducing Rachel. **

**I didn't plan on talking about her for a while but I had to write it at least to see where she was. It turned out to be a good idea because while I was writing it I get a very clear picture of her story. Now I know that Rachel is in a really dark place in her life and that she's not gonna ****get through it on her own.**

**Hope you enjoy the reading and, d****on't be shy, leave a comment ;)**

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**CHAPTER 3: WHITE WALLS**

She hated those white walls and she really couldn't understand why.

She was lying on the bed, the mattress was too thin and she could have sworn to feel the bed slat beneath it. She turned and tossed around hoping to get some sleep but, of course, there was never the chance: she was restless, as she had been for the past few months. It wasn't that Apocalypse thing (_the world ended Rach, face it and move on_) but the person she turned out to be because of it.

She remember when she still had dreams and she thought she could be a star, a role model, someone to look up to, an inspiration or – as she called herself – a selfless emotion giver. Looking back, now, all of that seemed stupid and pretentious. It took her to live through the Apocalypse to understand it but, at least, she learned her lesson: real word is hard and physical. All that emotion stuff is just some fancy talking you can indulge into if things are going really good or really bad, depending on where you stand on, but when you try to survive emotion become a baggage that slows you down. You start hoping you can stop feeling, then you start thinking you don't need feeling and then you end up believing that feeling is just useless. And by then singing about "feelings" is just the stupidest thing among a long list of stupid things you could do.

So, nope, no more singing for Rachel Berry anymore.

- Are you up Rachel?

- Come in.

Patrick peeked inside. He was a shy boy, which was a rather strange quality given their situation.

- Are you… presentable?

Rachel sighed. She was presentable, indeed, but that wasn't really the point.

- Come on in, you idiot!

He opened the door furthermore, taking a few steps inside. Patrick was a nice looking guy, dark skinned and with soft and curly brown hairs.

- So, tonight. – He started.

- Yes, tonight.

- I know you don't like this kind of things but I do believe it's a good idea. It will help to take the edge off for so many of us. A little normality, you know, it might do wonders.

- If you say so.

Patrick moved forward and sat on her. He played for a little while with her fingers, slowly massaging them and then interlacing them with his own.

- I get that you're not a party girl but I was wondering…

- Yes – She cut him off before he could finish – I will be there with you, obviously.

- Obviously… you make it sound like a duty.

Rachel sat up and took his face in her hands looking straight at his eyes. She didn't say a word; she just leaned over to place a light kiss on his lips.

- Go – She whispered, moving her hands on his chest and gently, but firmly, pushing him away.

Patrick sighed and obeyed.

- Later Rach.

- Later P.


	4. The Mall

**When I started to write this fic I didn't know exactly where it was headed but as I'm writing it things get clearer and clearer. So, since things are changing as they go, I decided to shift the story category from Angst/Romance to Angst/Hurt and Comfort. Of course there will still be romance but I don't feel like it's a main theme. **

**Also: t****his long chapter so I hope it makes up for the last short one. ;)**

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**CHAPTER 4: The Mall**

It took most of the late afternoon and evening for them to finally find the mall Quinn mentioned. They had walked silently on the city roads, paying attention to every noise or sound that might announce someone else's presence but there was none.

- That's it! – Said Quinn when she finally recognized the mall.

- Ow, I can see why it set you off.

The left part of the building was collapsed and the big sin at the entrance was dangerously dangling down in front of the main door. There were a lot of abandoned car in the parking lot, most of them covered with the dust from the falling.

The lights are obviously off and it doesn't look like a place to explore when you can't see where you put your feet – said Anya taking charges of things – so I motion for us to settle here tonight and go tomorrow, early in the morning. Anyone in favor?

Mal grunted something taking his backpack of his shoulders. Quinn tried to object but closed her mouth instead. Anya was right; going in without light was suicidal.

- Majority wins. I'll take the first guard round, then Mal and then you.

- Looks like a plane – Answered Quinn, taking the sleep bag Anya was handing her and still looking worriedly around.

* * *

They choose a corner in the parking lot, between a couple of cars but close enough to the street to be able to see someone approaching. Anya took something from her back and ate, while Mal quickly unrolled his sleep bag and tuck himself into it and Quinn followed soon after that. But the instant she placed her hands under her head to try to sleep, she knew that wouldn't have been an easy night. It was because the hard ground wasn't very comfortable, of course, and because the fast turning of events had made her trust Anya and Mel even if she didn't know them at all (_and that, Fabray, is breaking the very first rule of surviving 101_), but most of all she couldn't sleep because of the thought of being again in their place, feeling their hand on her body. She turned around. Mal was appeared to be sleeping. His chest moved up and down very slowly and he looked peaceful. Relaxed.

_How the hell does he do that? How can he just turn off everything and just fall asleep?_

There was no moon in the sky which, given their situation, was good news: if those men were to come around, the lack of light would have made it difficult to spot the three of them. Quinn tried to reassure herself with that thought but her mind was racing between memories of what happened to her in that same city just a few weeks back. She tried to remove that though focusing on something else and she looked to where Anya was standing. She was motionless and for a second Quinn though she might be dead but, no, of course, that was a silly thing, there she was, moving her arm to tuck some loose hair behind her ear.

There had been really no chance to talk to that girl and Quinn had a lot of questions for her, first of all why in the world would they save her! That was breaking rule number 2 on the survival 101 mentioned before, any newbie should have known that! Quinn couldn't understand: pity was overrated well before Apocalypse and after that… it was a luxury no one can afford.

_Shit. I should leave them and stop this nonsense._

But as Survival 101 third rule thought her: stick around as long as you have something to gain, then flew away fast. So, yes, she was going to be around for a while, maybe enough to understand where Mal took the apples, enough to find a bike for her and some other supplies and then she would have left.

_Ok, it's a plane. You work fine with plans, Fabray, just follow them to the letter and there won't be any problems._

When Mal turn came up Quinn got up from her sleep bag.

- do it, I can't sleep anyway.

Anya looked at her trying to judge her physical condition. Was she showing off strength and endurance or was she really able to pull it through her shift?

- Fine, but when you're tired wake Mal up.

* * *

Quinn nodded and took her place sitting on the ground.

- Anya?

Quinn called her name softly. Anya opened her eyes and the first thing she saw was Quinn's hair beautifully dangling on the sides of her face. Then she saw the light sky.

- It's morning – She stated.

- Yes.

- And you didn't sleep.

- How can you tell?

Anya showed her for the first time of many her "do-you-think-I'm-such-an-idiot" face.

- Ok, I was up, mom, I missed my curfew, we can talk about you grounding me later on, now we have to go.

Quinn woke Mal up while Anya smiled at her back. Tired!Quinn let her barriers down a little bit and if Anya stayed on her tiptoes she could peek into Quinn's soul. She liked what she saw.

In a matter of minutes the three of them were ready to go in. They entered the mall form the main door. There was rubble on the floor and the plants that were supposed to welcome the visitors with their bright colors and smells were brown-ishly dead on their vases; on their left poster of a travel agency showed heavenly places that, maybe, didn't exist anymore.

- Let's see what we have here. – Anya approached the big map that listed the shops. – On the left collapsed side we had…. pizzas, electronic and stuff, clothes and, ow, too, bad… music store. Sorry Mal. – The boy looked at her quizzingly - I've always pictured you on a beach, by the fire, with a guitar… no? No! Ok, my bad. Anyway it doesn't matter, we're not going there. On the bright side, and on the still standing side of the mall, we have… drum roll please… - Anya looked at Mal that shook his head and then complained mimicking hitting on an invisible drum – See? Music guy, I've told you! And here we go! Clothes, drug store, sport stuff, and a lot of other things we don't need to look at. I'd say it sounds promising.

- Don't keep your hopes high: it might have been all robbed. – Said Quinn, arms crossed in front of her chest, eyes darting around looking for possible threats.

- Don't keep you hopes too low – Anya answered – we might still find something.

Quinn could have taken this response badly if it wasn't for the smile Anya gave her while saying it. She wasn't being arrogant or imposing, she was just being optimistic. Quinn had forgotten how to be like that.

- I say we stick together. If we part we may be faster but I don't feel like taking the risk in here. – She turned to Quinn asking her opinion.

- Sure.

They headed down the mall passing past a bar, and a couple of stores with glasses and phones. They stopped briefly at a clothing store but there were mainly high class clothes that didn't seem right for live or die situation, then they finally reached the sporting good store that was one of their main goals.

They started going up and down the aisles looking through shelves and leftovers.

- Told you. Plenty of people have already been there – Said Quinn pointing at the empty shelves.

- There are still tennis rackets…

- Here! – A male voice startled Quinn who instinctively clung to Anya's arm. Anya put a reassuring hand on the blonde's one.

- It's ok, it's just Mal

Quinn released her grip feeling stupid. She took a deep breath and started to apologize but Anya stopped her before she could do it.

- Let's go see what he found.

Mal was standing in front of a wall waiting for them. A couple of fishing rods were still in a rack.

- Nice! We had one of those before – She explained Quinn – But we broke it on our first fishing attempt. We were never the fishing types, right Mal?

- I can fish. – Said Quinn – Or at least I could. My father used to bring me with him when I was a child.

- Perfect, our guild just acquired a fisherman or… fisherwoman, whatever. Anyway, good for us. So, what do we need to take?

Quinn looked at the equipment and choose the shortest rod that seemed easier to handle, then went to look for some spare fishing line, fishhooks and baits that all ended up in Mal's bag. They move then towards the camping area of the shop but that was absolutely empty. There was some swimming equipment that they didn't' even take into consideration, as well as soccer and football shoes and a lot of different sport's balls.

- Feels weird, right? – Asked Anya moving a hand on all that dusty stuff – Before apocalypse we thought we needed all this stuff, we wanted it and some of us had to put away money to buy them, and now they're here, free to take, but nobody needs them.

A lot of things had changed, and this wasn't even one of the most relevant ones.

- Let's go, we still have a lot to do.

They walked further in the mall turning right on the central crossroad. There was a drug store and, although Anya insisted to check it, it was obvious that everything was already been taken. They do stop at a library, though, and both Mal and Anya took a couple of books.

- Seriously? World fell apart and you fill your survival bag with books? – Asked Quinn.

- I do not fill my bag and, besides, if I want to survive I have to take care of my mind, soul and mental sanity as well as my body so, yes, I'm going to take books with me.

Quinn shrugged and left them to choose their reading. She considered books as something shallow and futile in their situation but, deep down, she knew Anya was right. There were days when she had been stuck in a hunting lodge or a cave because of the weather, and she was left with nothing but her own thoughts. Books could have been really useful to her back then. Still, she was playing tough and she wasn't going to stop it just because Anya might be right, so she kept her steady and serious face and waited for them to catch up and continue on their exploration.

Next they went shopping for clothes. There wasn't much of a choice left but they did find something. Anya spent most of the time helping Quinn finding something for her since she didn't have any spare clothes.

- I take you don't want to talk about how someone who survived so long doesn't have any change clothes in her bag? – Tried Anya while handing her a white tee a little too big.

- I had to leave in a hurry – The blonde simply answered, moving toward the dressing room to try on some pants.

* * *

She was in her underwear when Anya bursted in the room placing a hand on her mouth and gesturing to be silent. She sat on the chair in the corner lifting her legs up, pressing her foot on the wall, and then gestured to Quinn to join her so that their feet wouldn't be visible from outside. Quinn sat on Anya's lap hugging her knees. She could hear, now, some footsteps but couldn't understand if or how close they were. She asked Anya for the boy saying his name without voicing it, but Anya shook her head. She didn't know where it was.

- Clear.

The male voice was just outside the dressing room. Quinn yelped but Anya quickly muffed the sound covering her mouth with a hand. Quinn's eyes were wide in terror, she was trembling and one step away from completely freak out. Anya looked alternatively at the door and at Quinn. The blonde was on the verge of doing something incredibly stupid like throw open the door and try to run for her life in her underwear. She moved her hand on Quinn's lower back hoping – God, praying – that the contact would not send Quinn over the edge. Anya tried to be gentle but firm. She felt the body stiffen under her touch and for a moment she thought to have made a huge mistake. But, instead of freaking Quinn out, that touch seemed to bring her back to reality. She acknowledged Anya's presence and nodded slightly.

The man outside the dressing room was still lingering. They could hear sound of clothes being moved on their hagers and Quinn clearly pictured a big hand moving over them, touching them with filthy fingers. Again she found herself slipping down to unpleasant memories and just Anya's hand, moving in small circles on her back, kept her on earth.

- No one in my section. What are you doing? – Another male voice arrived

- My brother gave me one of this when I was fourteen. – Said the first man – I thought it was the coolest thing ever until I found out it was fake. That asshole bought his little brother his first sport t-shirt and he went on a shitty Chinese store, can you believe it?

The other men laughed.

- Take one now, it will make up for that old one.

- Nah, I'm not into sports anymore. Let's go get the others. We still have to check other places for those three

- Fine.

For a brief moment Quinn heard the footsteps going away, and then nothing. They stayed still for a while longer then Anya gently pushed her down and, without saying a word, motioned for her to get dressed. Quinn put on the pants and the white t-shirt, then grabbed her old clothes and stuffed them into her bag.

In the mean time Anya opened the dressing room's door to peek outside. The place looked desert. Anya stopped briefly to gaze back at Quinn: she looked still scared but in control. They went outside and started to look for Mal. He had heard the two men approaching and hid but, as soon as they were gone, he got up and went for the two girls.

- We need to go. – Anya whispered when she saw him

- No. They're leaving the mall, right now this is the best place to be. – Said Mal and Quinn realized that was the first complete sentence he said since the two of them met. – We should trace back their steps, continue our search and then exit from the back.

Anya turned to look at Quinn who nodded.

- He's right. They won't come back; we just need to be careful.

They spent the rest of the day looking through stores but, as Quinn predicted, there wasn't much left. Except for two pair of sunglasses they didn't find anything else: food and hardware store were empty and the one thing Anya hoped to find, a bike for Quinn, was nowhere on sight.

When they left the mall it was getting dark again but given the close encounter they had previously, they decide to go as far as they could leaving the city. They walked on secondary roads, trying to hide and be quiet, and when they finally left the city behind them it was past midnight and they were hungry and tired.

Mal offered to take the first shift and neither Quinn nor Anya protested. They both laid down and fell asleep almost instantly.


	5. Nightmares

**CHAPTER 5: NIGHTMARES**

Someone was following her. She couldn't see who it was but she knew, in her dream, that it would have killed her. She ran away but she kept on falling down and once she looked at the ground she saw the corpses of her friends and family, their eyes wide open, mouth filled with worms and flies. She tried to get up but the hand of her dead roommate closed around and ankle. She pulled but couldn't free herself and she had to reach down and broke her friend's dead fingers to be able to get up and run. She realized then that her feet were naked and the ground was wet and slippery. She fell again. Whatever was following her was closing the distance. She could feel its breath. While she was trying to pass over her mom's body it grabbed her by the arms and painfully secured them behind her back and then turning her around.

That's when she woke up bathed in her own sweat.

* * *

Mal saw her sitting up, frightened, but didn't ask anything. Quinn couldn't say if it was because he respected her right to have bad dreams, or because he was too scared to have a connection with her. Anyway she wasn't ready to talk and was grateful she didn't have to make up some lame excuse to avoid his question or his pitiful look. He gave her a few minutes to calm down and then got closer with some water which she accepted.

- Go to sleep Mal, I can take it from here.

He nodded and went to bed.

Quinn didn't need a PhD to understand the tricks her mind was playing on her. She thought she handled everything fine but her nightmares proved her wrong.

_It's the city. It's because I was brought back there, that's all. I'm fine. You're fine, Quinn, stop playing the victim and get a grip!_

She was never indulgent with herself. She was raised to be a winner, and winners don't cry over themselves, blame their bad luck or wake up covered in sweat like children who secretly went watching a horror movie.

But then of course, she was living in a horror movie.

_Stop it Fabray! I'm serious._

The night always made things look worse than they were. Quinn knew that, eventually, in the morning, everything would have fade away and she wouldn't be able to understand her fear. But in that moment her mom's face hunted her.

They were together when the first earthquake hit the city. When the ground started moving it took a while for them to understand what was happening.

- Jesus Quinn! Get out, get out now!

Pictures were falling from the walls and Quinn could hear things breaking in the kitchen, where dinner was cooking. She yelled to her mother to follow her and run for the garden, but when she turned around her mother wasn't with her. She screamed.

- Mom!

The front wall of the house collapsed. She could remember how the whole house fell down, like here was a big bad wolf blowing on the little pigs' houses.

- MOM!

She screamed, again and again, she run to the house, tried to dig with her bare hands while the ground was still moving under her feet. All around her other people saw their own house fell down, some of them lost family members too. There were screams, and people crying, and a female hand, motionless, her mother's hand.

- MOOOM!

_Stop it Quinn!_

The blonde got up and went to take an apple from Mal's bag hoping he wouldn't mind. She needed to do something to stop thinking and eating was as good as anything else.

The night was cold. They had just two sleeping bags, no blankets, not even a jacket. She used to have one, a nice jeans jacket, but they took it from her in the city.

She couldn't remember how many days she spent at their place, it all seemed blurred and confused now, but she knew that, as soon as they brought her into, they left her just with short pants and a shirt: no shoes, no jacket, no protection whatsoever; they made sure to do everything they could to avoid her escaping.

- Hey! – Anya whispered coming to sit next to Quinn. – I think it's my turn.

No. It was way too early for Anya's shift but Quinn didn't feel like talking, not even to say something so simple and easy as "Not yet", so she just nodded and slipped into the sleeping bag. Of course she couldn't close her eyes and laid motionless for the rest of the night.

* * *

- So, where were you headed before, Quinn?

It was early in the morning. Quinn was rolling up the sleeping bag and Mal was checking his bike.

- Nowhere, anywhere… You?

- We were trying to find the road to Heaven.

Quinn stopped abruptly and looked up at her.

- Excuse me?

Anya and Mal exchange a strange look then they both burst into a laugh.

- I'm sorry, your expression was priceless, I couldn't resist!

- Glad I could cheer you up – snorted Quinn

- Seriously, though, we were really looking for Heaven, though not the religious one. While we were on the road we met a few people who told us about it. It's supposed to be a military facility, where there's still electricity, and lots of supply meant to last in war.

- And how would they know about it.

Oh, you know, I'm sure even some of those who trolled the internet with conspiracy theories survived the apocalypse and they probably started this legend, but, it's not like we had any better plans anyway so we though to look for this… Heaven, or as me and Mal call it "The army's B plan".

- And you still want to look for this place?

- Do you have any other suggestion?

No, she didn't. She lived day by day, even the idea of "next week" seemed something out of reality for her, let alone a plan to settle somewhere. She shrugged.

- You're free to go where you want.

- Aren't you coming with us?

- I don't think so, I'm not really a people person.

Anya was caught out of guard. It took her a moment to answer and her voice was really low and slow.

- We're not people, we're Anya and Mal, and besides we're not so many, just the two of us.

Quinn paused considering the situation.

- Why would you want me to stay? I'm grateful that you saved me and all but, let's face it, if I stay it means we have to find food for three, water for three, shelter for three… and I know from experience finding supplies for one person is difficult enough.

- A wise man said once: if we can't live together we're going to die alone.

Quinn was stunned by the quote and then it was her turn to start laughing. Mal looked at her puzzled but Anya smiled. Finally someone recognized her quotes.

- So that's the legacy of our world. City burned down, society doesn't exist anymore and all is left are quotes from a tv show? Dear god, no wonder we got destroyed like we did.

- Still our situation is not so different from his and he was right, you know that, don't you?

_Is this really happening? I'm taking vital decision for my life based on a TV show that didn't even had a proper end?_

Anya seemed to understand her thought.

- Let's be serious here, Quinn, you tried to survive on your own and you know how hard it is. We're struggling too. It's not like if we stay together everything is going to be ok, there will be rainbows in the sky and chocolate fountains waiting for us. It's going to be as hard as it was before, but maybe we might have a better chance: taking turns, covering more ground, sharing knowledge.

It made sense. Quinn knew it, but she was afraid. During all the months she spent alone she really missed being with other human being but, on the other hand, being with people meant grow fond of them, feel again, and with feeling always came pain. She wasn't sure she could handle anymore.

- We're not getting married Quinn, and it's not going to be forever. Let's just give it a try!

_As long as you don't care for these people it's fine Quinn. Just remember: no string attached and it's ok._

- Ok – Quinn finally said. – I guess we can try.


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER 6: Heaven**

She used to love parties. Not anymore.

Three weeks before Patrick noticed that most of the survivors were struggling with frustration, anger and depression. He could understand those feelings: although the facility helped them a lot providing a shelter and very useful supplies, they all had to fight constantly to do the simplest thing. They gave so many things for granted in their past life, and now they were forced to see how hard it was to grow a simple plant and not to buy it on the market. That, and the number of losses they all suffered in the past months, were driving them over the edge.

He started to think of a way to loosen things up a little, to let people know that there was still hope and those things were going to be better, and he remembered of the two guitars he saw in one room on the second level underground. That's how the whole idea started.

- Maybe.

- Come on, Rach, can you show a little more enthusiasm?

- It's just that, I don't…

- I know, you're not the party kind, you already told me that. Although when you were with Dean it seemed otherwise.

- Not fair. – Rachel answered quietly.

A year back a comment like that would have made her snap and/or slap his face. Now she just calmly resented his words. He didn't apologize.

- You could be a little more supportive. I'm doing this for all of us.

- I know. – Rachel got closer and placed a hand on his chest, smothering his shirt – I will.

Patrick spent the last two weeks organizing the party. He went among the survivors to find someone who could play, and he actually found two guitarists, a piano player, three drummers and a violinist. It was way more than he dared to hope, and it gave him energies and strength to go on with the preparations.

He called a group of people to work with him, and they closed the main hall for more than ten days, letting the hype built among the survivors.

He meant well, he took seriously his leading role, and he tried to do his best. Rachel admired him for that, but she also knew that all his efforts were vain.

She had been one of the first survivors finding Heaven. At first seeing all the supplies in the magazines and the lamps lighting up because of electricity she felt hopeful, but after a few days she started to realize that, no matter what, their life from that moment on was going to be just an endless struggle to survive. Their life wasn't worth leaving anymore. She knew it and they, eventually, would know too.

Rachel opened the draw of her table and took the envelope in it. It was almost empty, meaning that soon she would have to take a trip to the second level underground, where she hid the rest of it. But for tonight was enough, enough to relax her and make her go to that idiotic party. Patrick would be waiting for her, that evening, and she needed to be at her best to pretend to be the perfect companion of a fearless and selfless leader.

_Shit._

Her hands trembled and she was getting anxious. She barely had the time to do it before preparing for the evening. She needed a bath but to get it she would have to bend some rules.

_Tell the truth Rach, you're going to steal someone else's turn and you're going to get away with it. Your dads would be so proud…_

But her dads where dead so were all those who knew the good, old, determined, stubborn, dreamer, Rachel. It would have been more accurate to say that she had died with them too.


End file.
